So this is life…the only one we get apparently, so we better
make the most out of our time here.
I was recently having a conversation with a high school
student on my bus and she had brought up that she was thinking about quitting
the sport that she plays so that she can work instead. I know she has a really
hard working family and I know that there are a million things out there that
everyone thinks they need, and most of these things are obtained through
purchasing them with money earned by work…but sometimes I think we forget that
the best things in life are truly free. They’re not things at all, but
experiences and time spent with people doing things…anything can be fun if you
have the right combination of people, even if it’s just you.
So I told this girl my standard response when I hear that
someone is thinking about quitting a sport, or any other extra-curricular
activity…
Some of my greatest friends when I was a kid use to play
sports with me, in fact, they were some of the best pure athletes that we had
in our class. They worked hard at being good, but they had all the basic
athletic talent to start with that so often makes a good athlete a great one.
But then, something happened. For some reason they decided to quit sports. It
may have been that they wanted to make some money, or that they didn’t like the
coach harping on them, or whatever. The point is they quit, and I didn’t.
I have a very diverse group of friends, I like to think that
I can be friends with anyone and I try to be. I like the diversity because
every different person brings something new to a situation and to the little
time I have on this planet. But in high school, you get busy with school,
sports, work, and hopefully family. The time you have left over is generally
spent hanging out with the people you spend a lot of time sharing common
interests with, such as sports. The friends I had that quit playing ended up
spending their time with the people that didn’t play sports and all too often
these kids ended up getting themselves into trouble…and stayed there.
Now I’m not going to say that athletes don’t know how to get
themselves into trouble, it’s really quite the opposite of that. I spent most
of my high school career getting myself into trouble, but there is also a
stigma that goes along with being an athlete, especially in a small town. The
whole town may know what you’re up to, but a small community likes to see their
high school teams do well, and they’re willing to look the other way every now
and then to keep the teams players on the court/field/etc. It’s sad but true.
But whereas I may have had the occasional cocktail or two while in high school,
my former friends started hanging out with rougher and rougher crowds, not just
getting into alcohol but drugs as well. One thing led to another and before
long these kids were pegged as “losers” and once that gets put into your head,
it’s hard to get it out.
Basketball and Football kept me out of trouble in high school
for one reason or another. They also helped me to at least pass my classes
because I wanted to stay eligible to play sports. I was by no means the
greatest student that my school has ever seen. I lacked motivation in the
classroom and I’d like to say it was because everything just came so easy to
me, but mainly it was because I simply lacked motivation. I think that I am a
pretty smart guy, but a really smart guy would have spent more time working on
school, getting a scholarship and getting his college paid for!
Which kind of brings me back to this student I was talking
about. I think she has a really good head on her shoulders and wants to have
money so that she can attend college, and really be able to live independently
someday, which is something I think most of us were shooting for in high
school. But here’s what I told her, and what I hope she really holds onto from
our conversation: “You only get one chance to be a kid.”
Pretty simple, and we’ve all heard it a million times…but
looking back, do you think you really accomplished it? Do you think you got the
most out of your time?
Personally, I think I did. I believe I had a pretty decent
balance with everything that went on in my life and had a hell of a time doing
it. I got to play sports and learned discipline and team work. I spent oodles
of time with my family and although it wasn’t always the cool thing to do, I’ll
cherish that time more than anything else I did. I also was introduced to
organized religion through the Catholic Faith (not for me), got a basic
education which eventually laid the groundwork for me to continue into college
and helped me to develop a thirst for knowledge that has never been quenched…even
if it didn’t appear until after my first attempt at college turned into a 24
hour party…for 5 years. I also have a very distinct moment in high school where
I grew a backbone and stood up for something I believed in. The experience wasn’t
a great one as it ostracized me from most of my class for most of my senior
year, but I stood up for what I thought was right and it’s something that I
have an easier and easier time doing as I get older. It started in high school
at a moment when I decided that what I was doing might not be popular but it
was what was right.
It has all been part of my education, my life lessons if you
will, and I attribute most of it to my parents letting me become the person I
was destined to one day be. Am I all they hoped for? More than likely not, but
I’m me and nobody else can fill the role!
So if you take anything from this blog, I hope it’s not,
live your life with no regrets, or anything cheesy like that. Everyone has
regrets. You can call them mistakes or lessons or whatever, but you’re only
lying to yourself…they’re regrets. We make mistakes in our lives, things we
wish we could change, but sometimes you can’t, sometimes you must just move on
with your life and try not to miss the next great thing.
No, the one thing I’d like you to take from this blog is to
live a balanced life. Make time for the important things and never turn down an
opportunity to try new things and meet new people. Fill your little time on
this planet with as much joy as possible, and hopefully if you do it right, the
things people will remember about you won’t be your regrets but the example of
how to live your life to the fullest.
Now, I believe it’s time to switch sweatpants and settle in
for another long day on the couch watching college basketball…maybe I missed
the lesson…
Go Duke (like go home, because you’re done now…)!
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