Basketball and Resiliency...

As I continue to grow older I seem to spend less and less time learning my life lessons at the bars and more just in my everyday life.

The thing about getting older is that things we were once able to accomplish without much effort now seem like they take a lot out of us, or at least can’t be accomplished with as much ease as they once did. One of the largest areas where this seems to come into play is with exercise and keeping in shape. Things we did when we were in our teens, or even early twenties, such as eat or drink ridiculous amounts and have no trouble keeping the pounds off, or even getting the motivation to do some exercise afterwards.

#4 Dusty Neibauer...still has it.

While I was attending college at MSU-Moorhead, a group of friends and me would spend at least four hours every night at Nemzek Hall playing basketball. Once we finished we would either go and get some homework done, or a lot of nights we would head over to my place, play some cards and spend most of the rest of the evening drinking and harassing my poor roommates (Two to Deuce), sorry guys! But the next day most of us (not always me) would get up and go to class, then hit the gym, and start the process all over again.

Not only were we able to put forth a good effort academically, but we also ended up being pretty good basketball players, putting forth a great showing in our pick-up games at Nemzek as well as winning several adult basketball tournaments.

In those days people were always trying to join our team or were worried anytime they saw that they were facing us in a tournament. We didn’t always have the same name, but they could pick us out by looking for the most ridiculous team name on the bracket (such as, That’s a lot of Potatoes), and when they faced us they brought their A-games. Once in all of our glory, we even beat a team comprised of most of the MSU-Moorhead college team. They always put together an intramural basketball team (cheap bastards) and in front of a surprisingly large makeshift crowd, we beat them when Dan Nyberg knocked down a three from about six feet behind the line…a story I will no doubt tell my (or at least someone’s) grandchildren someday, and embellish the hell out of the whole ordeal.

But my life lesson today doesn’t center on how good we were , or how pitiful it is that at 32 I’m already talking about the glory days, no, today’s lesson is centered upon resilience.

#13, Kurt Philion showing off his ball skills.

Back while we were actually a force to be reckoned with people would ask us what we were up to that weekend and we would state that we were going to be playing in a basketball tournament. The standard reply generally went something along the lines of: “Well you boys have fun, and don’t get into too much trouble!”

Fast forward a few years.

We’re now around that 26 – 28 age range, and people ask us, what are you up to this weekend? To which we reply, we’re getting together with our college buddies and playing in a basketball tournament! The puzzled looks on their faces speak more than words can say…but they say them anyway…

     “Friend”: Are you coaching?

     Me: Nope, we’re playing! It’s an adult basketball tournament!

     “Friend”: Aren’t you guys a little old for that stuff, don’t you think it’s time to give up the ghost?

     Me: Are you kidding?! I love basketball, and what better excuse to get together with the guys?!

     “Friend”: OK, well have fun I guess…

It should be noted that at this point we are also starting to lose members of the team, not necessarily because they want to be done playing, just that other things have started to take precedent in their lives, such as work, wives, and kids. We generally only play in about two to three tournaments a year, but the girls who used to join us for these adventures have now become mom’s and have become much more responsible, in many cases either forgetting the amount of fun they used to have, or remembering and worrying what kind of trouble their husband may still get into! Some of my greatest memories of these basketball tournaments are the amount of fun our whole group used to have together, not just the guys, but the girls that would one day become their wives and the mother of their children. I truly knew the brides when they used to rock n’ roll.

TJ Super taking it to the hole, while Jason, Ryan, Kyle, and Pat just watch.

So now we recruit new members or scrap together the guys we can in order to form a team. Some friends get the green light to partake in a weekend of basketball and debauchery, some don’t. We gather up a few younger guys to fill the gaps and still put forth a pretty respectable team. We’re not the feared force we once were, but we’re still having a good time playing the sport we love, getting some exercise and still finishing about the middle of the pack.

Notable changes include; forfeiting games because we can’t get out of bed, losing by 20+ points, having our ankles actually broken, and a noticeable decline in our popularity at the night clubs…

Fast forward to today, or at least this past weekend…

After trying for several years (7 or 8) we were finally able to put back together a good portion of our old team, as well as some guys we’ve been playing basketball with for a few years who are our same age. How do we accomplish this? One of our friends is having a birthday party for his two year old at a Holiday Inn in Fargo, which happens to be happening the same weekend as our basketball tournament! This means that not only will the husbands be allowed to come hang out and play some basketball, but the wives (and kids) will also be in attendance! But in these few years (we’re now 32-34 years old) a few other changes have occurred, starting with that same old conversation…

     Friend: What are you up to this weekend?

     Me: I’m going to play in an adult basketball tournament with my college buddies!

     Friend: Oh really, where’s that at?

     Me: Fargo.

     Friend: Good for you. I’m glad you’re still playing!

The last statement is said with some sadness and is also stated as almost a backward compliment. Just hearing the words come out of their mouth I can hear both that they are kind of sad that they aren’t able to do things like this anymore but they are also impressed that at my age I still can. Society has beat them down to the point where if someone is still doing things such playing in adult basketball tournaments at 32, they should be commended…but when did I get soooo old?

Granted it takes me far longer to heal from an injury now, and even just playing sparingly I usually end up sore the next day, but I find that if I continue to exercise I’m actually a lot better off now than I was a few years ago. I’m generally a lot healthier, drinking less and exercising more than I did in my late twenties. I’m no picture of health but when I do play basketball or go for a run, it really makes me feel pretty darn good. I need to do more of it and eat healthier now than I used to, but I also still play at open gyms where I play with guys in their 50’s who still play against kids who are 18…and they’re still very good.

The saddest part to me is that I’m now at a point where it’s a badge of honor that I’m still playing at all, whereas it seemed like only a few years ago we were at the top of the game.

So we put together this team, and in the build up to the tournament I kept thinking to myself, and telling anyone that would listen, that we should have a really good team for the first time in a long time. That it was actually one of the best teams I’ve put together in years…and then we proceeded to lose every game in our tournament.

Dan Nyberg getting ready to audition for the AND1 Mixed Tape tour.

It turns out that none of us are afforded the opportunity to play four hours of basketball everyday still and we’re playing against people who can. We’re craftier now that we’re older and can still put points up on the board, just not with as much consistency as we once did. We’re getting older, there’s no doubt about that…but I truly hope we all keep playing and getting together to act as if we are still as good as we once were.

Even if we can’t hang on the basketball court, the group was all back together (for the most part, except for the ones without babysitters) at the bars…and once or twice a year, we can still hang with the best of them there!

Basketball and sports in general, aren’t something reserved for the young. Recently our sports teams from my little town all ended their seasons and for some of them their high school careers. These are kids who I remember from being the little tag-alongs who would accompany their parents to our Sunday night open gym and we would let them shoot shots over us to make them feel special. These same kids are now making us all look like old men out there, but it’s safe to say that they have great parents who introduced them to an activity that they can do for a very long time. Sports are something that can bring us together, young and old alike and that’s certainly something we should all fight to try and hold onto.

Don’t expect this to be the last blog centered on basketball, it’s taught me many lessons in my life and I look forward to continuing to play and learn. For all of those high school seniors who are now moving on from their organized sports, as long as you love the sport and are passionate about playing, keep it up. Someday it’ll be your kids who learn to love the sport by watching their parents out there, and they’ll learn a ton of life lessons along the way. It’s a great way to teach them how to be passionate about something and how life can always be fun.