It’s been a while since I took to the net to get my random
thoughts and opinions into all of your heads, and that’s mostly because I’ve
been in a sick bed recovering from an over exposure to apples. Turns out 30
apples in a week may just be too much fiber…
The first blog was extremely well organized with the exact
stats, and had a real nice breakdown of how exactly everything went during the
dare, I am not exactly that organized though so I’ll see what I can do with
this.
Day 1
I began my morning with two apples, than continued to munch
on them as the day went on finishing my day at 8 apples. At the beginning and
end of the day I posted what I was doing and the total I was at that night onto
Facebook as I am constantly starving for attention. I also spent a lot of my
night in the bathroom…
Day 2
I started my day the same way, two apples for breakfast and
then munched throughout the day whenever I had an opportunity. I finished once
again with 8 more apples, bringing my two-day total to 16 apples. When my brother
got home from coaching at a local basketball camp he told me that at least ten
people had come up to him wondering about the apple challenge, I wasn’t quite
full but my attention fix was starting to be satisfied.
I also went the entire day without using the bathroom, which
seemed awfully strange to me since I think I was totally exceeding my
recommended daily amount of fiber…
Day 3
Day 3 was not a great day for me. I woke up in the morning
with my stomach in absolute knots. It felt like I had eaten an entire Apple
tree and it was desperate to get out. This morning I had no trouble at all in
the lavoratory…
I was definitely sick. The thought of apples made me sick,
seeing them made me feel terrible and when people asked me about them I kind of
wanted to punch them in the face…apparently I had brought it on myself though,
or so the people I threatened told me.
The roughest day I had had in months resulted in me eating
no apples and thinking that this was a challenge I simply was not going to be
able to complete. I wasn’t too proud of my day so there were no posts on
Facebook or twitter. I was kind of hoping that everyone would just forget about
the whole thing.
Day 4
I woke up and went on Facebook to update our company page
and then checked my Facebook where one of my friends had posted that she had
eaten an apple at the Bonnaroo Music Festival and had thought of me…ego stoked.
It was time to get back on the wagon…or off, not really sure how that works,
it’s my first experience with addiction (unless you count video games and
alcohol). Maybe we should call it back on the apple wagon, hell maybe that’s
where it comes from?!
Two apples for breakfast got me back on track and then five
more throughout the day got me within reach of my goal of 30. Four day total
was now up to 23 and I was feeling a little more confident about my progress,
then I found out that the other two challengers finished the challenge that
day. My dreams of becoming the apple champ were crushed. Where was I to find
the motivation to continue on?!
As a great man once said, “Sometimes you have to complete
your journey even if you’re the only idiot that cares that you did it.”
That great man was me, I’m fantastic at self motivation.
Day 5
I awoke to my alarm and I kid you not the song that was
playing was “Eye of The Tiger!” Nah, that’s a lie. It was actually just the
buzzer that’s super annoying and I really had to use the bathroom so I had
actually been up for hours by the time that went off. But the stage was set,
seven apples to go and besides the early morning trip to the loo I was feeling
pretty good about my chances.
Two for breakfast…five to go.
Two for lunch…three to go.
Then we got busy with camping, tubing, etc…
My next apple didn’t come until about 10:30 at night, but we
still had to shut off some radios in the campground and double check to see if
anyone needed anything else before we took off for the night, but it turns out
people don’t tend to really think you care if you’re eating an apple the whole
time you’re talking to them.
10:45 – Two apples to go.
11:15 – One apple to go…
11:35 – Surprisingly the last apple was not a challenge at
all. The worst part by far was eating the seeds, stem, and whatever that thing
is on the bottom of the apple is called. Our buddy had been posting stuff all
week about how the seeds contain arsenic and that eating enough of them will
certainly kill you, so when I was eating them I found myself wondering…was it
worth it?!
I had done it. 30 apples in five days with two days to spare,
which I set aside for getting my colon cleansed. Just kidding, that sucker was
pretty cleaned out after this whole experiment!
I had completed the dare, but had come in last so what did I
win? Respect. Oh, you say that you actually kind of respect me a little less
now? Well I guess I got to eat a bunch of apples then. Wait, I can’t count that
because I had to pay for all of them? Well, I guess if you’re reading this,
then you can say that I’m no longer starving at least…
Update:
I’m officially entering myself into rehab as I cannot get
through a day without craving an apple. One of us is homeless now as he has
been attempting to support his apple addiction and word on the street is that
he has been pulling a DiCaprio circa Basketball Diaries just to get his fix.
The winner of the competition has moved to Florida to live amongst the “Apple
People.”
Talk about Life Lessons.
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